Sweet Pea: Goodbye
by anxious.soul
Summary: Steve receives a call saying Peggy has died. Four of the Avengers gather around to comfort him, forgetting about the fifth. Tony mourns on his own as he remembers all the times he had with his Aunt Peggy. (Inspired by prompt).


**Inspired by prompt from tumblr user tonystarkismyprompt :**

 **'They all rally around Steve when they get the news. They keep him company and hold him when he cries and try their best to distract his thoughts from his long lost love.**

 **Peggy Carter had died, and Steve was mourning.**

 **But they didn't seem to realise that Tony was mourning too. But why would they? They didn't know. They didn't know that Tony even knew Peggy, didn't know that he called her his aunt or that she had been one of the only people to truly care about him as a kid. They didn't know that she was his rock more often than not or that he had spent many a night held in her arms as he cried over how utterly unfair life was. They didn't know. So they didn't care. They didn't care that Tony was falling apart, his heart torn and bleeding, that he was lost (his rock was gone), and he desperately needed a hug, something to keep him together. But they just didn't know.**

 **(Or the Avengers all comfort Steve after Peggy dies, not realising that Tony was also suffering from the loss.)'**

 **Warnings: Alzehmier's Disease, Funeral, Mentions of Death, Swearing, Not CA:CW Compliant. Natasha, Clint and Steve are a-holes to begin with.**

 **Disclaimer: It should be obvious that I don't own Marvel or the Avengers and personally, it's a bit silly that I have to mention this...**

 **Crossposted on my AO3, which is anxious_soul**

* * *

Steve looked down at his phone as a call came in and hastily answered it. The phone fell from his hand as he covered his mouth in horror.

"What is it, Steve?" Clint asked coming over in worry,

"Pe…Peggy…she's…she's passed away." Everyone quickly went over to comfort the crying man, no one noticed Tony quickly run out of the room. "The funeral…is in three days." He sobbed.

"Oh, Steve. I am so sorry." Natasha whispered running a hand down his back comfortingly as Clint moved to the other side and Thor sat alongside Bruce in front of the trio with worried expressions.

Four of the Avengers stayed around Steve. Comforting him and distracting him as much as possible until the day of the funeral when he'd most likely fall apart once again.

 **—LINE BREAK—**

The billionaire watched in confusion as the blond leader began to cry. Then he whispered haunting words. As his teammates all gathered around Steve, Tony made his escape. Stumbling out and into the elevator that took him down to his lab. The second he entered his haven, he threw himself to the side and slumped down the wall with a thump.

"You have a new message, sir. Would you like me to play it?"

"Go ahead." Came a barely audible response through Tony's sobs,

 _"Hey Tony, it's Sharon…Aunt Peggy…she…"_ There was a muffled cry, _"She passed away in her sleep. I…I hope you come to the funeral…it's in three days…on the 21st…Aunt Peggy… she would…have loved for you to…to say something…"_ Sharon went quiet on the other end and Tony thought the call was over but she spoke up again, _"Tony…don't lock yourself away…you can't bottle it all in. I know…I know you love Aunt Peggy…she was like a mother to you…and I know these past few years have been difficult…but you can't hide away. You need to…you need to let it all out. Mourn. Please for your wellbeing…mourn and cry. Let it all out."_ She was quiet again and released a sniffle, _"If anyone has the right to grieve…it's you. Call your friend, Rhodey. Let it all out, cousin. Love you, Tony…I hope you come to the funeral_." The message ended and Tony released a choked wail.

"Would you like to send a message back? Or shall I do one for you, sir?"

"Tell…tell her I'll be…there." Is all he said through his tears,

"Certainly, sir." There was a brief pause, "You have my condolences, sir. Mrs Carter will be missed by all. I agree with Miss Sharon Carter that you should call Mr Rhodes." But Tony didn't answer, he just buried his face in his arms, which were wrapped around his knees. The arc reactor made it difficult for him to breath, but he was too upset to care. When he began to feel faint, Tony threw his head back where it smacked the wall painfully. He lost himself to the memories of his precious aunt:

 **-** The times she visited Stark Mansion and came bearing gifts before Tony was shipped off to school.  
 **-** When she celebrated with Tony for coming first in the 4th Annual M.I.T. Robot Design Award.  
 **-** When she was standing and cheering at Tony's graduation…the one his own parents couldn't make.  
 **-** The day she walked solemnly up to Tony to hug him tight at his parents' joint funeral.  
 **-** Then the following days when she slapped him out of his hangover and told him to stop drinking himself half to death.  
 **-** The day he came back from Afghanistan and she stood by Pepper's side, hugging him and comforting the stoic man.  
 **-** Then staying by his side for the next few weeks to make sure he was okay (and because she thought he'd vanish the minute she looked away).  
 **-** She held him tightly after the near-death experience with Obadiah ripping his arc reactor out and then him dying. She stayed for the fallout (Tony's mental breakdown).

Tony scrubbed at the waterfall of tears that rapidly fell down his face, he released a watery chuckle at some of the memories that clouded his mind.

 **-** The time Peggy heard about his birthday along with his Palladium poisoning (she was not amused at his excuse of " _thought it would be my last_ ") and gave him a black eye (for an almost ninety-year-old, she could still pack one hell of a punch).  
 **-** The day Tony and Sharon had to take her to a home. Of course, it was full of the best nurses and was suitable for Peggy. But at ninety, Peggy could no longer live at her own place, despite her holding onto her strength for so long. She was just too frail now.  
 **-** The painful day when her Alzheimers got the better of her.  
 **-** Then the day Tony thought was one of the worst days in all his life (it sat up there with his own parents' deaths with Afghanistan, the poisoning, the wormhole, etc all far down below it). It was the day Peggy called him 'Howard'. He had walked into her room just like he had the previous week, with a grin and some flowers. He'd kissed her cheek and taken a seat on the bed after placing her favourite flowers in a vase. " _Oh, Howard, those are lovely. I can't believe you remembered them!_ '" Tony just grinned tightly and played her charade. The moment he'd walked out of her room, he'd managed two steps before falling against the wall and bursting into tears.  
 **-** The following visits (which with Steve now awake and aware, he'd had to be a bit careful to visit her) were much the same. She called him Howard and didn't really seem aware of Tony. Save for the times she mentioned him as though Tony was still a child. ( _"Howard, you mustn't be so harsh on young Tony."_ , " _My little darling is so intelligent, isn't he? I bet he'll give you a run for your money when he's older!_ " and so on)

And that was all the memories he had of the beautiful woman. The incredible British woman he would now have to see off at her funeral. Another piercing sob crawled out of his throat.

 **—LINE BREAK—**

It was the 19th now. Tony had made his way out of his lab -still dressed in yesterdays clothes, with messy hair and puffy eyes with bags- and up to the common floor kitchen to grab some coffee as he had run out. Unfortunately, he ran into Steve's parade of comforters. Two of which glared at him…

"Steve has just lost his first love and all you care about is coffee. How selfish and uncaring can you be?" Clint snapped as Natasha glared menacingly. Bruce looked down at his tea, his expression blank but Tony had seen the disappointment run through his eyes and Thor carelessly continued to eat his pop-tarts, not paying attention to the current situation. The billionaire ignored him as he looked through the fridge and grabbed a packet of blueberries. He went to leave with the fruit and his coffee in hand but a petite hand painfully grasped his arm.

"You are a selfish and vain man. Let go of your ego for once in your pathetic life, Stark and show some compassion." She snarled, digging her fingernails into his skin. He ripped his arm from her grip and looked at her with dead eyes before going back to his lab. No one saw him again that day. Not that anyone cared.

 **—LINE BREAK—**

The funeral was tomorrow. He hadn't gone up to eat or drink as he'd thankfully had plenty of coffee in his lab. No one had bothered him either. Which was good…only…it wasn't. He wanted someone to notice. To realise that he was mourning too. Logically, he understood why no one had taken a look at him and thought ' _something is clearly wrong with Tony_ ' or maybe even used the brains they _apparently_ have and realised that if Howard Stark knew Peggy Carter and was friends with her…then surely, _surely_ that meant Tony Stark would _know_ her as well. But no one came to that conclusion and why should they? They didn't know he knew her. He'd never even _hinted_ that he knew Peggy. They didn't know that he called her his aunt or that she had been one of the only people to truly care about him as a kid. That she was practically his mother! They didn't know that she was his rock more often than not or that he had spent many a night held in her arms as he cried over how utterly _unfair_ life was. They didn't know. So they didn't care. They didn't care that Tony was falling apart, his heart torn and bleeding, that he was lost ( _his rock was gone_ ), and he desperately needed a hug, _something_ to keep him together. But they just didn't know. And they wouldn't. They wouldn't know until tomorrow when he stood in front of them all, dressed to the nines with sunglasses completing his look as he spoke about his beloved Aunt Peggy. And they probably wouldn't care. Tony would bet his entire fortune, that _at least_ one of his teammates would think he was doing this to 'steal' Steve's 'thunder'. As _if_ it was a competition about who was mourning the most. Tony was lost in his thoughts as he stared at his reflection before snapping out of it and grabbing his overnight bag and headed downstairs to the limousine that Happy was using to drive the Avengers to the airport where they would take Tony's jet to London, England where Peggy's funeral was taking place the next morning.

No one spoke to him on the car ride there. No one spoke to him during the flight either. Bruce and Thor sent him worried looks, but neither said anything even as they sat beside the man and subtly rubbed his back as though coming to the realisation that something wasn't right.

 **—LINE BREAK—**

"Finally come to give Steve the support he needs?" Sneered Clint breaking the apparent and unspoken rule of 'do not speak to Tony Stark' as the group stood awkwardly in the elevator heading slowly (so it seemed) up to the floor their rooms were on.

"You have been awfully rude, Tony," Steve whispered hoarsely and Natasha snorted,

"That's putting it politely, Steve."

"Yeah, Stark's been a jackass," Clint said from behind Tony as the group made their way out of the elevator and down the hallway to where their rooms stood (rooms 101, 102, 103, 104, 105 and 106, the odd numbered rooms were to the left with the even numbered rooms on the opposite side)

"I have to agree with them, Tony. You could've been more supportive. It was very selfish of you and I'd finally began to overlook your ego and selfishness." Steve said staring at him with those red and sad blue eyes of his. Tony's fist was clenched tightly, "Don't you know what I've lost? She's the last piece to my past. She was my first love." A loud crack echoed through the empty hallway as Tony stopped outside of 103, his room. His fist lay against the wall by his door. He turned, taking his sunglasses off to show his red-rimmed eyes complete with black bags, he stared at them blankly.

"You knew her for a few years! Three at most. She may have been your first love and what appears to be your last, but she lived her life unlike you who _insists_ on staying in the past. Yes, you can mourn. You can cry. _I don't give a single fuck_. But listen here. I knew her for _forty-six years_." With that said and done, he swiped the card key and entered his room, making sure the door closed with an audible click as he refused to stay around for the aftermath.

 **—LINE BREAK—**

"I wouldn't worry about it, Cap. Stark's just being a dramatic a-hole. He probably only knew her distantly. Why would the woman you speak about, give a crap about him?" Clint snarked as the remaining Avengers stared at Tony's door, Natasha nodded in agreement and the spies turned to their own rooms, gently pushing Steve to do the same, leaving Thor and Bruce staring at Tony's door and then their gazes met. With a silent sigh, the pair went to their rooms on either side of Tony's.

 **—LINE BREAK—**

It was 10 pm when Tony received a knock on his door.

"Who is it?" HIs throat hurt as he spoke from crying,

"Room service!" Came a shrill voice and with a confused frown, the billionaire made his way over and opened the door to find Thor and Bruce standing there with bottles of alcohol.

"What do you two want?" He asked exhaustedly as he led them inside and took a seat on the couches in his room.

"We want to apologise." Bruce started staring at Tony with honest remorse, "We saw that something was upsetting you, but we ignored it. We let Clint and Natasha say hurtful things about you and we're supposed to be a family."

"We are truly sorry, Anthony…how can we make it up to you?" Thor asked,

"You don't need to. It's fine." Tony murmured with a grin,

"Your press smile doesn't work on us, my friend!" Thor exclaimed and Bruce reached across, placing his hand on Tony's knee,

"We want to be there for you." The sincerity on both of their faces was enough for the tears to begin to well up. One by one they trickled down his cheeks making paths for the following ones as they went. He scrunched up his eyes once before opening them and seeing soft smiles as his friends moved beside him, sandwiching him between them.

"Let me tell you about the time Aunt Peggy kicked ass. Both mine, my dad's and some jerk who bullied me…" He said, his voice quiet and soft as he gave them both a small and real smile.

 **—LINE BREAK—**

Disrespectful, some may think, Tony knew exactly what his aunt wanted him to wear for her funeral. They'd talked about it once. Morbid? Yes. But, Tony had been…in a drunk and depressed mood -the one person he had truly loved, had cheated on him, but that's not the point. He could remember the conversation as though it had happened minutes ago -Hell, he could _hear_ Peggy and him talking right this second like it had been recorded and was being played right this second.

 _("Aunt Peggy, when I die, I want you to wear your beautiful red dress with your matching lipstick. I want you to be dressed to the nines where everyone can see and know you could kick their arse should you need or want to." Tony had told her with a big, sluggish and drunk grin from where he laid on her couch. His eyes were fluttered as he was minutes away from sleep._

 _"Darling," She had said looking at him with concern as she placed his head on her lap and gently ran her hand through his dark locks, "You assume you will die before me." Tony just grinned lazily at her,_

 _"You've seen the news." He murmured, "People are betting on my death. If you die before me, what should I wear?"_

 _"Oh, darling." Peggy murmured, a tear trickled down the strong woman's face as she looked into her 'son/nephew's' sad and glassy eyes, she looked up for a moment as though to think, "Should I pass away before you -and darling, I so hope I do, as I wish for you to live life to the fullest, to have a long and happy life- then I would like you to wear a… purple suit." She smiled down at him, "A purple waistcoat matching a purple tie, blazer and pair of trousers with a white shirt." Tony gave another sloppy grin to his aunt before his eyes closed and he fell asleep with a quiet snore.)_

Tony adjusted his suit. The very suit his aunt had described that had been sitting inside his wardrobe with an air of foreboding as it waited patiently (or perhaps impatiently) to be worn on the dreaded day that was the 21st of June 2016…exactly three days since Peggy's passing. He sighed and left his hotel room to get a taxi to the church for her ceremony. He was met with Thor and Bruce as he waited for the elevator and the three went together. Luckily neither of them questioned his peculiar attire.

 **—LINE BREAK—**

Taking a seat beside Sharon, who had hugged him tightly and was now clutching his hand like it was her lifeline. Tony hadn't seen Steve or the spies that morning and was hoping not to until the end of the ceremony. Sharon had stood to do some talking before inviting Tony up. She gave him a tight hug and a kiss to the cheek as he reciprocated before wandering back to her seat.

 **—LINE BREAK—**

"Would you look at that? How disrespectful can you get?" Natasha snarled looking at Tony who was getting ready to speak,

"Not only is he kissing Peggy's niece, but he's also wearing a bloody purple suit!" Clint snarked back quietly (totally taking the cheek kiss the wrong way) and Steve did nothing but nod in agreement as his eyes shone with tears that had yet to fall.

 **—LINE BREAK—**

"Thank you, Sharon." He murmured and looked at the closed casket beside him. Gently he touched the lid before looking at the crowd, "Some of you may be thinking that I'm being disrespectful for not wearing black. I don't care. A good twenty years ago I was absolutely drunk and Aunt Peggy was taking care of me -no surprise there." He got a bit of a chuckle from the crowd of teary-eyed people "Morbidly, I told her what I wanted her to wear to my own funeral and then I asked what she wanted at hers." He gestured to himself, "Aunt Peggy always did like unoriginality." He lifted his sunglasses and scrubbed at his eyes with his shaking fingers before deciding to take them off and pocketed them,

"You know what. I shouldn't be hiding my tears. Not for this." He looked at her casket, "Not for her." His voice a whisper as he stared for several minutes before turning back to everyone once again, "Peggy. God, Peggy was…There are no words to describe that woman. She was incredible. Amazing and invincible…at least that's what I believed. The prospect of _her_ dying is just… _wrong_. If you looked up the word 'badass', you'd see her name and photo as the definition." Tears fell softly and landed on his hands that were clasped together on the podium.

"She's always been there, you know? She never once gave up on me when the world was against me. Never once did she let me down. Whereas all I ever did _was_ let her down. Peggy is…was a strong, brave and incredible woman. She never took any bullshit. Never once. She was all bark _and_ all bite. She…" His throat tightened, "She was my rock. The past five years have been difficult for…everyone. Her fight with Alzheimer's finally got the better of her and…she…well she believed I was my father. No one knows how difficult it was the day she forgot about me. The day I walked in to visit her and she -I can still remember it as though it was yesterday- said _'Oh, Howard_ ' It…it broke my heart." He felt his knees shake and a trembling hand began to tap against his arc reactor.

Tony turned away from the group and placed a hand on the lid of the casket, "Oh god, Peggy. I don't know what to do without you. I can't handle life without my rock. I just _can't_." His voice was nothing more than a whisper, but all could hear and Sharon decided to make her way back to her cousin. She wrapped him into a hug and allowed him to cry into her shoulder. Whispering words of comfort through her own tears before leading them back to their seats. The majority of the crowd were silently crying now. Many had known about the unbreakable bond between Peggy Carter and Tony Stark.

 **—LINE BREAK—**

Tony didn't stick around for the drinks at the pub after his aunt had been buried. He instead disappeared. Standing above a mound of dirt in front of a headstone that said: ' _Margaret Elizabeth 'Peggy' Carter_ '. He bent down and placed a bunch of Sweet Pea flowers on top of the fresh unearthed mound. They were her favourites and also were the flowers of her birth month.

 _("Aunt Peggy."_

 _"Yes, darling?" The British woman asked holding a six-year-old Tony's hand as they walked through the street on their way to the park on the warm and sunny day._

 _"What are your favourite flowers?"_

 _"I rather like Sweet Peas. Why do you ask, darling?" Peggy asked, Tony just shrugged,_

 _"I'm not sure. It's just I've seen you get a lot of red roses and you never really look happy about it." She smiled down at the little boy,_

 _"You are a very bright little boy."_

 _"_ 'm _not little." He pouted and she chuckled,_

 _"Of course not, darling." They entered the park and came across several stands and little shops. Peggy reached into her pocket and pulled out some money and handed it to the Stark heir, "How about you go and buy me an ice lolly and get yourself an whatever you wish, I'll be on that bench just over there. Do not go off with strangers. If anything happens scream for help and stay in sight." She told him crouching down to eye level, "Do you understand me, Tony? I'm not trying to talk down to you, but you do understand-"_

 _"That due to my name, people will try to kidnap me and hold me for a ransom." She nodded solemnly, and ruffled his hair,_

 _"I'm sorry darling. But I trust you. Don't prove me wrong." She kissed his forehead and wandered off to the bench allowing Tony to wander up to the stall to get them both an ice cream. As he bought treats and headed over to his aunt he spotted a flower stall. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his own pocket money -his aunts change sat in his other pocket so he knew what to give her back- and made his way over to the stall._

 _"Excuse me, do you have any Sweet Peas?" He asked politely causing the owner to look down at him with a soft smile._

 _He made his way back to his aunt. Two ice lollies in his hand whilst the other held a bunch of flowers. He grinned as he moved them behind his back. He handed the ice lolly over to his aunt._

 _"What have you got behind your back, darling?" She asked leaning forward with a smile as Tony blushed slightly. He handed her the flowers with a shy smile,_

 _"These are for you."_

 _"Oh Tony, they are beautiful." She kissed his cheek and pulled him in for a hug, "You are just the sweetest." They stayed quiet as they ate their ice lollies in silence._

 _"Auntie Peggy, what do these flowers mean?"_

 _"Well. They are mean 'blissful pleasure, delicate pleasure, good-bye, departure, adieu and thank you for a lovely time'. They are also the birth flower for April, which as you know…"_

 _"Is your birthday month!" She nodded with a loving smile.)_

"Oh, Peggy." He murmured looking at the grave as the rain began to fall, covering Tony's tears, "I don't know what to do without you. I mean sure, you didn't recognise me anymore, but still…you were my rock. Even when I visited you and you call…called me 'Howard', you still…seeing you always made me feel better. Now you're gone. I…I just don't know what to do." He slumped down to his knees and bawled his eyes out in the pouring rain. By the time he had made his way back to the hotel, his suit was muddy and soaked. He didn't care about the dirt he was traipsing through the clean hotel, he'd just give the hotel more money.

 **—LINE BREAK—**

He'd showered and changed into some pyjama bottoms and threw a t-shirt on. He was curled up in his bed staring blankly at the wall as the TV played in the background. A knock came on the door. He ignored it. The knocking didn't stop. He made his way to the door and opened it.

"What?" He asked as he saw Thor and Bruce there. They entered his room, "Okay, make yourself comfortable I guess." He muttered as he closed the door and made his way back into his bed. The two stayed there on either side of Tony, just hugging him and comforting him as he cried silently. The three friends fell asleep together.

When morning came, Thor woke to three soft knocks and gently slipped out of the bed leaving a snoring Bruce and a curled up Tony fast asleep. He opened the door, amused as Steve, Clint and Natasha looked surprised by his appearance before their faces fell into ones of guilt and remorse.

"We wanted to talk to Tony." Steve murmured looking ashamed,

"Well, he's sleeping."

"No, I'm not. What you guys want?" Tony asked suddenly appearing beside Thor with Bruce behind him, he rubbed at his eyes,

"We want to apologise." Steve said as the group walked back into the room and sat on the couches, "I was the selfish one. You were right. Of course. You knew Peggy your whole life and I only knew her for a few years. I…it's just difficult because I'm…I'm holding on to the past and I'm just so, _so_ sorry, Tony."

"I'm sorry too. I should have known better than to call you selfish, vain, egotistical and pathetic." Natasha murmured genuine regret in her emerald eyes,

"I'm sorry as well, Tony. I went too far. I should've known something was wrong. We're friends and I was a jackass."

"It's alright." Is all Tony said wrapping his arms around himself. The group of Avengers spent the rest of the day (they weren't checking out and going home until the next day) squashed into Tony's large bed watching TV and just being a family. Sure, Tony was still hurt with the way they'd treated him, but they'd work on it and become closer. Despite everything…Tony was certain Peggy was smiling down on him, she probably thought he'd be fine without her now that he had five _rocks_ and that he wasn't alone.

* * *

 **Authors Notes:** **So the ending is quite poor on this and I'm sorry. I'm trying to write stories because it's what I love doing but I've just got back from holiday so still getting back to my routine, I'm a bit behind with homework and school, and I'm neck deep with stress because my A-level courses are new and complex. Again, I'm sorry, but I like to think the majority of this story is ok...**

 **Anyway,**  
 **Thank you for reading,**  
 **Hope you enjoyed this,**  
 **Please review,**  
 **No hate -don't like, don't read**

 **Bye~**


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